Lola O.
Hello!!! I hope life is treating you well and that today has been an awesome day for you! Happy White Day!

For me, these days I find myself saying and thinking, "so far, so good..." about work, life, me, and just in general everything. That high I've been on for my life has settled into this pleasant hum inside of me that dances around as I go throughout my days. It makes me smile. It makes me happy. I hope it never leaves, and if it does I hope it comes back soon:)!

So what's new? I'm starting my second week of teaching for the new semester and it's been challenging but good. I've got two new co-teachers and they are both lovely ladies, but teaching is definitely different this time around. I like it for the most part. With my 5th graders I pretty much do most of the teaching aside from games, and with my 6th graders it is equally split. I like having more responsiblity (so far) because it keeps me busy and I don't feel like I'm wasting time sitting around. I like having that authority to decide what is going to be done in each lesson, and doing the planning for it. It makes me feel like a "real" teacher.

My students are pretty cute, especially my 5th graders. I only taught one fourth grade class last semester so this year I only know a few fifth graders, but they all seem to know me and have a lot of enthusiasm during class. Which I love. I love that they participate, laugh, and get excited in my class. It makes it a lot more fun for me and in the end for them. Now, my 6th graders who used to be my awesome 5th graders are completely different. What happened to their enthusiasm? In just a few short weeks puberty got to them and now they are sporting attitudes, and they don't want to participate or answer questions anymore!!! What happened? I wish I knew. I hope they start loosening up and reverting to their adorableness of last year.

So far, so good on the school front. I enjoy teaching. I really do. I love making English fun for them, and being silly and dorky if it means they laugh and find English interesting. My kids make or break my day. Today I thought to myself, "why not become a real teacher then?" I love teaching, but it's not what I want to do with the rest of my life. It's not where my passion, heart, or calling is. At least not in the logical sense. I want to teach kids, but not in a classroom. I want to teach them as a counselor at school, and as a mentor/role-model in my personal life. For me I want to lead by example which means to teach by example. To be a walking textbook that guides kids to find their way and direction. To be the tool that creates a bridge between their dreams and reality. Something like that. If I were to be a teacher I would be an English teacher back home in high school. Yes, I have thought about it:)! But, for me I want to be a guidance counselor, so a year from now the road I'm on will diverge with that one and I will go from there. I'm so excited to travel down that road. The road I never expected for my life, but the one that feels perfectly made for me.

Hmmm...besides work, and figuring out where I'm going I've just been spending time on The Lighthouse, with friends, and relaxing. I've been trying to exercise more, and eat healthier this second year. So I've been walking home from school, cooking more, and eating my veggies. I've got a huge sweet tooth so it's been hard but it feels good. I feel good. I love walking, and it's definitely been helping me unwind and go home with a clear mind. It also gives me a chance to see what's around me and breathe it all in. It's funny in a not funny way the things you notice once you take the time to. The way I breathe easier, the wind blowing against my skin, the cars chugging along, the various stores with people shopping; all glimpses of our world, and with slivers of beauty in them. As long as the weather isn't too cold I'm going to do as much walking as I can because it really does make a difference.

I think this year is going to be a quieter one. Last year I wanted to experiment and try new things. I still do, but in a more subtle way. I'm not in such a rush to do so much. I feel more like I need to appreciate each moment, each experience as it without trying to think about what comes next or how can I do more. I just want to breathe it all in as it is and then breathe it out as it is. Nothing less and nothing more.

I've been back for a little over a month and it still feels like I'm settling back in. I don't know what this year is going to be like, mainly because I cannot see the picture:) but I do know it's going to be whatever I make it or choose for it to be. I am the architect of my time here. So how do I design my time? Do I fill it with trips? People?Worrying? Saving? New experiences? Shopping? So far everything is still blank and suspended in thought. Soon enough though I'll start to create my foundation for this year and go from there.

So pretty much life is, "so far, so good."

Be blessed,
~Lola O.~

Don't waste your time waiting for someone to tell you when
Begin again
'Cause walking outdoors only works if you show them
Begin again
And quit looking backwards and know where you have been
Begin again
You're no calendar
You're no concrete plan
Begin again
Don't waste your time
'Cause no one's gonna tell you when
Wake up
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