That picture pretty much describes how I am feeling right now about leaving for Korea in SIX days. I am a bundle of nerves and nervous energy and if I end up exploding at some people I am not myself right now.
Start of Mini-Rant Session: Honestly I don't know why I thought packing for Korea would end up being an easy task. I think I might have been a little insane when I had that thought. I mean knowing me I should have had warning that this would not go smoothly. So I decided in the last entry that I was going to bring 3 luggages instead of two. Well, the third luggage was a smaller one but after trying to pack my supplies into it and not being able to zip it up I decided to go for one that is the same size as the other two. I have the Samsonite 30 inch Mobile Spinners and although I am probably bringing too much stuff I think I would rather be comfortable than sorry. I am going to do packing attempt 2.5 in a bit and see how that goes. With six days left it feels like time is speeding up and working against me.
END of Rant:)
I am trying to remember to breathe, have fun, and just take it one step at a time. I know God will make my path smooth over the next year and that any obstacles that come my way will not be ones I cannot overcome. Today I just laid in bed and thought about the next year and why I am feeling so nervous. I think with all new things you can't help but wonder because no matter what you can never be prepared enough. I think my biggest fear is all the unknowns that I will have to take on one by one. I wonder if I am strong enough to really do this. However, I know if I didn't at least try I would regret it forever.
After praying and thinking I found some clarity and strength in myself. I just needed to tell myself it was going to be okay...I was/am going to be okay. I kind of gave myself a little pep talk to decrease my stress level. I think all I can do it try, and keep trying when/if I fall. I want to try and finish all this packing stuff latest Wednesday so I can spend Thursday hanging out with my family and friends and just relaxing.
I don't think I will be able to sleep Thursday night...I never can fall asleep the night before a big event and this is a really big event for me! I am leaving my house at 6:30 AM on Friday to give myself time in case of any airport issues. I am praying to God I have none of those. I think I just need to take a break from all this Korea stuff and hang out with my family and friends to clear my mind.
I have been having a music pick me up session and this song really describes how I am feeling about going to Korea.
The Countdown till I leave for Korea has started! I have a month left before I leave and it feels like time is speeding up and I can hear this internal clock ticking away. It is exhilarating and scary at the same time. I think the plane ride to Seoul is going to be the longest one of my life both literally and figuratively.
I just hope I don't end up crying when I say bye to my mother or have some kind of panic attack at the airport where I start questioning my decision to do this. I just don't want to freak out...at least not in public!
My days seem to be spent reading up on everything I can possibly find in regards to life in Seoul and stuff about South Korea in general. This is the first time I am doing something like this and I am doing it alone for the most part. So it is a big step for me to get out of my comfort zone and like Nike says "Just do it." As far as I know we only get one life, one chance to do the things we want to do while we can. For me, I want to travel around for now and that journey starts with South Korea.
I don't want to be tied down to one job or one place. Instead I want to experience different things so that when I choose that one job and one place in the future I won't have regrets about it. The sky is not my limit, I want to reach higher and higher heights until there is no height left to reach. Lately, I have been thinking about my future, and how I feel a lot more internationally inclined. It would be cool to work for an international company, be a diplomat or ambassador, or an international lawyer.
I'm hoping South Korea helps me get closer to figuring out where I am supposed to be and what I am supposed to be in the future. For once I don't have a plan, but I know God has a plan for me and he will lead me on the right path, the only path created just for me. It is kind of nice not having a plan and just opening my mind to the infinite possibilities of life. I'm 21 years old, I don't have to have all the answers, and I don't know how to ask all the questions, and that is perfectly fine. Lol...this isn't the post I planned but yeah:)
As far as my expectations/hopes for going to South Korea. I am expecting to have fun, learn a lot, experience so many different things, eat lots of delicious food, learn Korean, and make some good friends with minimum drama. I know I will have my ups and downs but for the most part it will be ups!:) I think my biggest fear is how people (Koreans) will react to me. I am not looking forward to being stared at or touched or etc..but I am going to have to deal with it so it is good to know what to expect!
Overall, I know it is all going to work out in my favour because God is supporting me in this endeavor. I think I am probably going to spaz out my last week here, but I am definitely going to enjoy my friends and family before I leave. So peeps if your in Phoenix we shall hang out before I go!!!:)
Hello everyone:I am Olabamidele Oluwadamilola Olanubi..but my friends call my Dele. I have always liked Lola O. as a pen name so I decided to use it for my time in Seoul; a place that will be a new beginning for me.
I am 21 years old and have just graduated from the University of Arizona in good old Tucson with a degree in Finance. I know what your thinking...why is a finance major going to teach English in South Korea. I am getting there so just be patient. I am a Nigerian-American, middle-child, Smallville fanatic, Korean drama/music lover, child of God, Coldplay loving young woman looking to challenge myself to do something a little crazy, very different, but most of all life-altering with this decision to go and teach in Seoul.
It all started about two years ago when I started working with international students in the Business Communications Department at my college. I was a communications coach which means I tutored students on their presentation, oral, and writing skills. Around that time my friend Flo was talking about going to Japan after college to teach English.
*The Epic Moment* As she talked about going to Japan I began to feel wistful and said to her that I wished I could go to South Korea to teach English and visit her in Japan. Being the smart and wonderful person that she is she said to me that I should go for it. She planted the seed and the idea took root in my head and blossomed into my dream of going to South Korea and teaching English. It wasn't until that simple yet profound moment that I realized I could make this happen. I could go to South Korea for an extended period of time and use teaching as my meal ticket.
The idea was still a little hazy but it was there and that was the most important thing. Now, prior to this Epic Moment I had been well versed in the Korean world as far as drama, music, and culture went through the wonderful Google search engine. My very first kdrama was Full House and after that I was hooked in everything Korean except the food since I had never had an opportunity to eat Korean food other that kimchi.
*The Double Rejection* Okay, so after this epic moment I started doing my research on different ways to teach in Seoul. I stumbled on the Fulbright ETA program, and the Henry Luce program applied for both over the span of several months. I ended up being rejected by both in the span of two days. I was crushed because it felt like my dream was lost. However, in hindsight I realized that being rejected was exactly what I needed. You see I hadn't been pursuing my true dream all along.
Originally I had wanted to challenge myself to go on my own, but the idea of the support network that came with the two programs was very appealing. I had been scared to follow my dream and so things fell apart.
*Everything Happens For A Reason* After my weekend of pity partying, I started fresh and began delving into opportunities to teach in either a public school or a private school. I ultimately decided public school was the way to go after reading this blog entry: Ginger's Official Guide... I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and getting rejected gave me the drive to truly go after this opportunity. I knew I wanted to teach in Seoul and applied for a position with SMOE using Korea Connections as my recruiter. I had two interviews, turned in my application, references, and etc before I got the job offer and accepted it.
*Limbo* If there is one piece of advice for me to give you it would be that having patience will make it all better. Right now I am chilling at home in Phoenix after graduating from college a few weeks ago. I am waiting for my contract so I can get the visa and flight stuff rolling. I am kind of bored with all this free time on my hands but at least it gives me time to update this blog.
So that is my story for the most part...ohh one more thing. The reason I want to live and teach in Seoul is because I want to get out of my comfort zone and challenge myself to really do it and take all the good/bad that comes with my decision to go. I am 21 years old and I want to grow into a better, wiser, and more courageous woman. What better way to do that than to take a risk, get on plane, go to a foreign country and teach English!
If you have questions don't hesitate to ask me!
Bi Rain: Oh Yeah ft Ai....Bi Rain was in the first Korean drama I saw which was Full House so he holds a special place in my heart when it comes to Korean stuff:) Best, ~Lola O.~
“As I get older, I want to be someone who feels happiness in little things. When I was younger, I had a lot of ambitions and was able to do a lot of things so it was okay, but I don’t want to live like that forever. I think it’s good to be satisfied with the decisions I make with life at that particular time, and live simply. That’s all.”-Juni
"And that’s why we travel, or why we should. Not to forget our worries, which will follow us anywhere – across oceans, up mountains, through deserts, down every crowded alleyway and boulevard of the city – but simply to be somewhere else. To exist, as always; but to exist in different surroundings. What happens after that, we can never really predict.... -Unknown-
"There is not one big cosmic meaning for all, there is only the meaning we each give to our life, an individual meaning, an individual plot, like an individual novel, a book for each person." Anais Nin
"We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other lives, other souls." -Anais Nin
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