Lola O.
I never understand what causes these bouts of homesickness I get. Maybe it's because I haven't been feeling well. Or that I keep thinking about my mom througout my day. Or that I really wish I could see my best friend and hug her. I'm going home in January for a few weeks, and it's a bittersweet feeling. I have so many people I want to see and spend time with, but the time I have won't be enough. I worry that I won't want to leave them for another year.

I'm sitting in my apartment in the dark with only the glow of my computer screen the only light and I miss home. I want to call my mom. Talking to my mom is like the best medicine for my soul. She just makes it better, period. We could be talking about mundane things  but hearing her voice and her laugh just brings me back to earth. I miss her. I cannot wait to see her in January and have her hold me. Just be together. I can't wait to see how much my baby brother has grown up. See his apartment. Stalk him at school:)! I cannot wait to see my sister, and just be together. Shopping, eating, talking. I cannot wait to spend some time with my best friend. Lately, I've been missing her more than usual, and am really thankful for her. I cannot wait to see my two dearest friends and their baby girls. So many beautiful babies to see. I can't wait for a DABA reunion. So many little things I can't wait for. Which is why my school needs to tell me asap when camp is so I can book my flight and make this trip home legit. I'm excited to see them, hug them, be with them for however many days we get. I'm looking forward to being around the people who keep me rooted in this world. Today I miss them more tha usual, so I feel a bit sad inside my heart. I don't know why I get like this, so emotional, but for some reason today I just miss what I had. I miss my home, my people, my...IDK I just miss everything.

Maybe it's the weather, or just my moody self. Whatever the reason, I'm in a funky mood, so I am going to watch Glee and try to cheer up. I guess being alone isn't the best thing when I'm homesick but I really don't want to go outside in this weather and try to meet up with people. Everyone is sleeping back home so I can't call them. Damn time difference. I've got tomorrow off, and I plan to make the most of my day. I'm going to enjoy every second of it.

"Even Now" by Dashboard Confessional
Even now I can feel your eyes

Watch me as I strum
Much too late at night
Even now I can see you smile
I can hear you hum
I can hear you sing
And I always can find you again
Even in the dark of night
Even in the lowest light
Even as the world outside
Is spinning, and spinning

Be blessed.
~Lola O.~
3 Responses
  1. homesickness in this way is part of living here. I too felt this way strongly when I first was here. Just know that it will make you bond even more with your family.

  2. I could never figure out what caused my bout of homesickness either. I could have had a perfectly good day, even a great day and then I'd find myself sad and wishing I was home. Missing all the comforts of home. From the everyday things to the special things that only home can bring.

    But now, I find I get that when here about Australia. I really need to coin a word for it too cause technically Australia isn't home...its just feels like it.

    Anyways, I miss you just as much as well. I cannot wait to see you.

    You said a reunion of DABA. Will Anthony still be here when you get here?!

  3. Lola O. Says:

    The homesickness just comes and goes when it pleases.

    IDK in Anthony will be there, I'll just hope so:)