Lola O.
Wednesday was another not so great day. Only two students showed up for ASP class, and no parents came for the open class. I was really frustrated about my students continually not coming to class, and no one doing anything about it. I got to leave early for once since the other teachers had already left for their monthly outing and I never get to go because of ASP. I was walking to the bus stop and suddenly decided to walk home in hopes of my frustration disappearing with each step. I guess I just care too much, and everyone else doesn't care enough. It just bugs me, because as I walked out of the school two of them showed up like class was just starting, and only because they didn't want to go home and get in trouble for not coming. I told them class is over, and that they need to go home and deal with their mothers.

The only excuse they have for not coming is that they just don't want to. Well if I'm going to prepare all these activities and games then you better get your butt in a chair and be there. Seriously, I can't keep having only one or two students come to class, because what fun is that to be the only student there? I've told my co time and time again, she sees what happens, and yet nothing changes. She tells them to come, I tell them to come, and they just don't. I've got three classes left of ASP and so I'm not going to get frustrated anymore. I have other things to get frustrated about besides their lack of attendance. I'm going to do my best and then go home and forget about it.

As I walked home yesterday, it felt good. The weather was pretty nice, the sky beautiful and cloudy, and as I walked my thoughts began to clear, and I felt better. I decided to visit somewhere I've been wanting to go but never did. There is this huge waterfall I pass on the bus to school, and on the top my co told me there is a little park up there. I trudged up the steps a bit disappointed that today of all days they were cleaning out the waterfall. The leaves were so gorgeous on the way up, and when I got to the top there wasn't much except for a few benches and tables to sit at. The gorgeous part was the view of life below. Next time, I'll bring my camera along and snap some fall colors. I sat there for a bit, did a little writing, and just took a moment to breathe. It bothers me that I get so frustrated about these kids. They don't care, and yet I do, but that's me I can't stop caring even if everyone else does. A blessing and a curse.

I stopped and got some pastries, went home and made some tea, and after a while I fell asleep on the couch. Sleep really is a natural antidote to a lot of life's problems. I woke up to knocking on my door, and lo and behold it was some adjumma bearing my YG Family concert ticket. Finally, and perfect timing. A little sunshine on a cloudy day. I got up, did some cleaning and decorating. Then I made myself dinner, and for once sat at the table, and watched A Cinderella Story since it was on tv. I made some lists for my Thanksgiving shopping, got things ready for tomorrow, and went to sleep early. I woke up around 4 AM from a nightmare with tarantulas. Not fun!!! I couldn't really sleep after that, and just drifted in and out until it was time to get ready for school.

As I walked to school this morning, I looked up at the sky like I always due and realized that no matter what comes my way I can and will handle it. None of my problems are as deep or a immense as the sky. I will overcome what comes my way. Today is another day, a clean slate to try things again. As I walked into school my students greeted me with their warm smiles and sweet hellos, and I thought to myself  "let yesterday, and focus on making today wonderful" that is what I am trying to do.

Today is Thanksgiving day back home, and I have sooooo much to be thankful for. I'm thankful for my supportive family, my amazing friends both here, back home, and spread out around the world. I'm thankful for all the dreams I've made come true this year. I'm thankful to be alive, and relatively healthy. I'm thankful that I have so many wonderful things to be thankful for. All those things far outweigh the bad moments

I'm not going to get frustrated or angry. I'm not going to get  disappointed or sad. I'm just going to do the best I can, and live with that. Trying is so much better than doing nothing. So I'll keep trying in everything and do and trust that overall everything will turn out great.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL. I hope you have a great time with your loved ones.

Be blessed,
~Lola O.~

"Shelter" by The xx
And I'll cross oceans, like never before
So you can feel the way I feel it too
And I'll mirror images back at you
So you can see the way I feel it too
2 Responses
  1. seoul me Says:

    are you going to the YG concert with someone? which one are you going to? i think i'm going to the 7pm one on the 5th ^^

  2. Lola O. Says:

    I'm going to the one on the 4th.